breaking free from the infertility time trap

ticking time of infertility

I feel the pressure—an invisible force that pushes on me, arriving unannounced, leaving no scars to show the battles I’ve fought. Time is a curious thing. A minute can feel like an hour, and an hour like a minute, but when it comes to infertility, time is more than just numbers. It’s the long-awaited dream that slips through your fingers, the river of tears that falls unheard.

Does anyone hear when I’m not pregnant again? It’s the question that keeps me up at night, where confidence is a mask hiding the inner voice screaming, “What am I doing wrong?”

I watch friends create families, smiling through the pain as I listen to parents complain about their children. My inner voice wants to shout, “Be grateful you have a child!” But I hold back, showing love and compassion instead. Inside, my heart aches in ways that can’t be explained, a constant reminder that something must be wrong with me.

Time ticks on, an invisible force that feels most real when we’re up against it, when we perceive an end or a deadline. We try to make life fit into neat boxes, and when it doesn’t, the pressure builds. But maybe, just maybe, we need to get back in sync with the moment.

Nature knows no deadlines. A seed is planted, and it grows in its own time. We can’t rush the process; we can only nurture it, giving it the best chance to thrive. Each month, our job is to receive the seed, allowing it to sprout and root in our womb. We fertilize it with nourishing food, positive thoughts, and love. We must let go of the war in our heads—the one that insists, “It has to be this time.”

It will happen.

If you don’t believe it will, then it likely won’t.

Remember: Losing battles can teach us how to win wars. For fertility, having to get pregnant this time is just a battle. The war is the journey, and it’s one we can win.